placenta for breakfast . . .

In natural/hippie mom circles, eating your placenta is the panacea for nearly everything:  postpartum depression, low milk supply, losing pregnancy weight, and basically anything else you can imagine.  Nearly every mammal does it, we reason (other mammals also eat their children who seem too weak to make it . . . so I'm not sure they're the best example!).  In my research, I only ever found one example of someone who regrets eating it.  It is interesting that it is like a supplement made especially and only for you by your own body.  Eating it is supposed to help you ease off the pregnancy hormones slowly, rather than dumping you in a pit of tears and night sweats while you're still weak from giving birth.

The placenta is a fascinating little bit of human anatomy.  It is the only organ that we are designed to grow and then lose.  It provides all the essential nourishment to the baby while they are in the womb.  It also generates the pregnancy hormones that sustain the little life growing within.  The "guided tour" of my placenta was one my favorite parts of Vicki Jo's birth.  My midwife Rebecca showed me where the blood vessels entered, how they branched, where any calcifications were (a sign of an old, worn-out placenta), and told me mine was good and healthy.

With Todd, my placenta was huge!  It was over a pound, and very long.  I had suspected it was large because it was so hard to get a good heartbeat on him throughout pregnancy.  Turns out my placenta was just covering the entire front of my uterus, so the Doppler couldn't get through it.

I thought consuming it sounded like a fine idea, but I wasn't sure which route to take.  You can go super-hard-core and just eat it straight up like raw meat.  (Actually it is raw meat, so it's not just "like" that.)  You can freeze it and swallow chunks like pills.  You can cook it and eat it like liver (that sounds horrid, although Joolz Oliver did it!).  You can also dry it and put it into capsules and then just take the pills.  That sounded like the best option for me, since I have no problem taking pills.  The biggest issue was that people want to charge you money for doing this!  Like hundreds of dollars!  No thanks.  So, I didn't really have a plan for it other than to save it in the freezer after Todd was born.

My amazing midwife Jennifer solved this quandary for me!  Just after Todd was born I asked if she knew anyone who encapsulated placentas.  "Me!"  she said, "But I haven't tried it yet.  Will you be my guinea pig, and I will do it for free?"  Um . . . yes!  So she whisked away my placenta, dried it, powdered it, and packed it into capsules for me.  Five days later, they showed up in my mailbox.  I asked her about dosage.  "Most women take two a day," she said, "but some go up to five and then taper off.  If you don't feel like you need them, you can save them in the freezer until menopause!  They are supposed to help with that too."

 
Due to many factors, I was having a pretty hard time immediately postpartum.  So I decided to go with the full five caps.  I started with five a day, taken right at breakfast.  It did really help my mood, and it helped me to shed pounds very quickly.  I think it also helped me have more milk this time.  I started tapering when Todd turned six weeks.  I went down to four pills a day, then a week later three a day, and so on.  Once I get down to one a day (next week), I will keep taking them until I run out.

I think I got way more caps than is typical because my placenta was so very big.  Most women get 100-200.  I estimate closer to 350 for me.  I don't find it gross at all - just like taking any other pill.  And you can't beat the cost for the benefits I've gotten!

todd reeves: the birth

Caution:  things are about to get very, very real on this blog.  If any of the following disturbs you, consider navigating away:  stories of addiction and recovery, explicit descriptions of nether-regions and birth processes, honest emotions, the reality of good and evil in our world.  Alternatively, continue reading and broaden your horizons!

As I rounded the bend into week 38 of my second pregnancy, a cloud of denial and confusion lifted and it became clear that my husband was an active addict.  Multiple substances were involved.  I won’t go any further into that nightmare, except to say that I decided we needed to separate for a while, and he decided to go to inpatient rehab.  We both knew this meant he would miss the birth.  This was indescribably sad, simultaneously very freeing, and absolutely the right decision for our family. 

In my 39th week.  Little did I know how long I still had to go . . . 

 As I struggled to adjust my vision of what birth and family life would be like, my blood pressure, which had always been borderline high throughout the pregnancy, began to skyrocket due to stress.  This was no shock to either my midwives or myself.  I showed no other signs of pre-eclampsia (no swelling, no protein in my urine, no headaches, not seeing spots, no stomach pain).  They decided, after some research, to keep me as a client, provided that things didn’t get any more out of control with my pressures and I continued to show no other worrisome signs.

The main thing on my mind was that I wanted to give birth to the baby before my blood pressure got so out of control that I would be facing another hospital induction.  I started taking a tincture of motherwort and hawthorne, which was rather dramatically effective at keeping my blood pressure in check.  (Here’s to living in a neighborhood with an herbal supply store and experienced herbalists to help me!) 

I also began doing all those things that are supposed to bring about labor:  eating pineapple, eating spicy food, acupuncture three or four times a week, chiropractic adjustment, massage, walking long distances.  Week 39 passed, then my due date. 

I broke out the big guns.  I started taking evening primrose oil.  I had my membranes stripped – twice.  I took blue cohosh.  My sister came to stay with me for a long weekend as I turned over into week 41.  I continued to have strong, painless Braxton-Hicks contractions, as I had for weeks.  I had been dilated to 4 cm for at least two weeks. 

This baby just did not want to come. 

I didn’t know if it was emotional reservations I was having about the birth, if God was trying to tell me that I needed to consider another plan besides home birth, or what. 

From checking my cervix, my midwife Jennifer and I both tended to think that the baby was asynclitic – meaning his head was tilted to the side and it wasn’t putting even pressure on my cervix to open it.  Only strong contractions would bring him into proper alignment. 

At 41 weeks and 3 days (Wednesday, May 15), I reached the end of the road.  Jennifer came over to check my blood pressure and other vitals.  My BP was way too high – 185/100, twice.  We talked over our options.  At 42 weeks, licensed homebirth midwives in Tennessee are required to take their clients for a Biophysical Profile, which is a cluster of tests on the baby that measure how well he is holding up in there.  The vast majority of women do not return from this test and are induced after the BPP.  Jennifer asked if I was willing to go in for a BPP the next morning, with the knowledge that I was most likely walking into a hospital induction.  I agreed.  Since I would have to do it in a few days anyway, why not just go ahead? 

But there was one old wives’ tale that I hadn’t yet attempted.  The dreaded castor oil.  I decided that tonight was the night, as I was staring down the barrel of another pitocin-drenched birth.  I took a tablespoon at seven pm, Jennifer came over and stripped my membranes one more time, and I started cleaning the house – trying to stay upright and get some good contractions going.  The castor oil wasn’t too bad.  I chased it with apricot nectar so I didn’t taste it.  It had the consistency of what I imagine motor oil might be like?  It’s a strong stimulant laxative that is really supposed to give you kicking diarrhea.  I had one measly, normal BM.  I figured I was immune to the stuff.  I took the dog for a long walk, paid the bills, did some laundry, and thought about packing for the hospital (Vicki was already with her grandparents for the night).  I took one more tablespoon of castor oil at 11 pm and lay down to rest. 

At about 1:00 in the morning, I rushed to the bathroom for the awful diarrhea I had been promised.  But it still didn’t really feel like labor.  After finishing up, I went back to bed and slept a bit longer, even though I felt some cramping.  At 3:00 or so, I woke up and could no longer rest comfortably through the cramping and contractions I was feeling.  Now THIS was labor.

I tried to take a bath.   The pain got more and more severe, very quickly.  I tried to stand up.  I tried to sit down.  I tried to rock back and forth, I tried to drape myself over a stack of pillows.  The contractions were coming so fast, I had no idea what to do.  I must have been having them every thirty seconds, lasting about a minute?  I couldn’t get my head together to time them.  I felt like I was losing it and I surely needed to get to the hospital.  My main thought was, If this lasts for ten more hours, I will die.  Finally, I texted my friend Stephanie who was going to support me through the birth, and midwife Jennifer.  It was about 4:17, according to my text log.  I texted them both:  “Come immediately.  Want hospital want drugs.  Can’t cope with this.”  They both responded that they would come right away.  I waited for what felt like hours.  I cursed them both, wondering if they fell back asleep.  I looked at my phone.  It had been six minutes. 

Steph got here first.  She had never witnessed a birth, and I apologized that this was going to cause her to never want children.  To her great credit, she was amazing.  Although I could tell she was scared by the drama of it.  All I could do was lean against the kitchen counter and yell “No, No, No, No.”  I cried to God to help me and save me.  The pain and pressure were so intense. 

Jennifer arrived shortly.  She could tell through the door, as she waited on my front porch, by my yelling and carrying on that this wasn’t going to last much longer.  I was either having a baby or going to the hospital.  I had a few more contractions before she could get me to lie down and check my cervix.  It was totally gone.  It was time to push!  Within a couple contractions I felt an unbearable urge to bear down.  I was standing up, leaning against the side of my bed.  Four or five pushes later, and baby Todd was born!  There was a huge gush of fluid as his head unstopped my water.  It was 5:06 am.  I had been awake for two hours. 

Todd’s shoulders were broad and he didn’t want to turn them correctly.  Jennifer had me push and pulled him out quickly.  He was big!  8 pounds, 12 ounces.  He looked so huge compared to Vicki when she was born (7lb1oz).  She wasn’t that size until she was almost 8 weeks old!

He had his thumb from the very start!  

I had trouble birthing the placenta, which was very large as well.  It took me about an hour and it was very painful.  They had to push and prod at my abdomen a lot.  I was so panicked because I thought the pain was going to be over when the baby was born!  No such luck!  After two shots of pitocin in the thigh to clamp down my bleeding, I was finally able to push it out. 

Stephanie had been holding the baby while I was delivering the placenta.  He hollered and screamed from the second he came out – very healthy and pink.  He had the “look” that overdue babies sometimes have:  long fingernails, dry skin, wrinkled hands and feet, thinning hair.  He was definitely fully cooked!

I felt great.  I didn’t have any tearing or need stitches.  I felt very tired, of course, and sore in all my muscles.  The birth had been so intense that I could hardly believe it.  I had what is called a “precipitous birth.”  This is the kind of thing where ladies have their babies on the sidewalk.  I was so lucky that Jennifer lives just around the corner!  Bobbi, our other midwife, didn’t make it in time. 

I am so thankful for the level of skill and care that our midwives showed to me.  They truly became friends and confidantes as they walked with me through a very difficult time.  There are unfortunate circumstances at play, of course.  But what has been so amazing is the goodness and grace that God has shown our family through it all.  I have had friends and family at my beck and call since Todd’s birth.  Someone stays with me every night.  People take Vicki to and from her school each day.  They bring me whatever food I want. 

In the brief time of Todd’s birth, I had to face my emotions about some very real evil that has come into my life.  I believe now that that is what was keeping me from birthing for so long.  And in labor, as I screamed “No!  No!  No!” I was declaring my opposition to this evil.  God is so good, and has given me another healthy baby and birth.  I have so much for which to be thankful, even in the midst of evil and suffering.  

labor foods

As we approached our 36-week home visit, our midwives gave me a list of items to have ready before the birth.  They wanted them all gathered in one place.  Some of them make perfect sense:  old towels, trash bags, plastic sheeting, ibuprofen.  Some of them left me scratching my head a bit:  apricot nectar, three baby hats, bendable straws . . . ?

Then there was the food list.  This was really kind of fun for me.  In addition to the aforementioned apricot nectar, I am supposed to have prune juice, electrolyte drink, protein snacks, carb snacks, and food for midwives and support people (especially coffee!).

I got the juices, no problem.

For protein snacks, I decided to have on hand:
-cheese
-boiled eggs
-homemade fruit snacks (lots of gelatin)

For carb snacks:
-assorted fruit
-homemade crackers

These are both carb and protein snacks:
-smoothie popsicles (yogurt + fruit)
-granola (oats + nuts)

For the support folks:
-coffee!
-oatmeal raisin cookies:  I made up a big batch of dough and froze half of it.  I kept the other half rolled in wax paper in the fridge.  I've baked up a few of them, and will just have them ready!  (I don't have a special recipe - I just use the one on the container of oats.)

And for the electrolyte drink, I found a few different recipes online to make your own.  They all involve these basic ingredients, in different proportions:  salt, water, honey, citrus.  Here's my recipe:

Electrolyte Drink
2 T raw honey
1/2 t sea salt
juice of one lemon
warm water

Mix first three ingredients in a quart-size mason jar.  Fill with warm enough water to dissolve the honey and salt.  Put the lid on and shake well.  Be sure to leave some headspace if freezing - it will expand.  Pop it in the fridge or freezer to sip as needed.

Hopefully I will just remember to pull it from the freezer when the time comes!

This drink would be really good to make up and have on hand for when your family gets a stomach virus, or if you are a big-time exerciser in the summer and need to replace lost fluids quickly.

Watch - when labor actually starts, I won't be hungry at all . . . oh well - these are still great snacks just to have around!

[This post is part of Fight Back Friday 12/20/13.]

the newborn toy box

We are in the final stages of preparing our home and our stuff to receive baby Todd.  Of course, there is no real "getting ready."  If there's one thing I learned the first time around, it's not to get too ready, because you'll have to change everything anyway.

But we got down the little cradle, the rocker, the nursing footstool.  We filled up a basket with diapers and wipes and other things we will need to change him.  And I sorted through the clothes, washed them, and got him a drawer ready in my dresser.

I also went through an old box of Vicki's toys and materials that she has outgrown.  Now, let's be honest:  newborns don't need toys!  They need holding and nursing and changing and feeding.  But having a little cigar box of items to help entertain him seems like a good idea.

Here's what I've got:

Clockwise from top left:  perfect pacifier from Michael Olaf, Plan Toys roller, a teether and a rattle from Little Alouette, Haba clutching beads, beads on a string (part of a 5-piece set from Pinkhouse Toys), and a wooden rattle I found on Amazon.  I only bought the Haba beads and the rattle from Amazon new.  Vicki had the beads and loved them, but we lost them somewhere along the way.

We also have some high-contrast black and white art cards for observing or hanging.  And of course our assortment of board books.  It's so nice not having to start from scratch!

36 weeks and moxa

I've been a little scarce.  I apologize.  Easter has a tendency to do that to us clergy types.  Add in pregnancy, toddler, best friend's wedding in New York, attempting to sweep and mop on some kind of regular basis, asking my dog to stop shedding so much godforsaken hair everywhere, and a winter that just wouldn't stop . . . and blogging kind of seemed unattractive?  But I'm back.  And I want to tell you about moxa sticks.  First, though:  pictures.

Here's a little side-by-side for you of 36 weeks with Vicki (on the left), and Todd (right). He is still a good deal higher than she was, and I don't feel nearly as miserable.  Plus, you get the bonus puppy AND baby photobomb in the more recent picture!  I am way less swollen than I was at this point with Vicki, not having the backaches and shoulderaches that I did with her, and I just generally feel better.

Okay, back to the moxa.  See, I went for my 34-week appointment with Bobbi, one of our midwives, and she shocked me.  First of all, my blood pressure was up (ugh).  That wasn't really so shocking.  I think the culprit is something I can't do a lot about:  stress.  I'm trying a few new things, including acupuncture, chiropractic, and more magnesium in the form of Epsom salt baths.

Bobbi also closed her eyes and used her hands to manipulate my belly, making a visual map of where she thought the baby was located.  She felt and felt, and then opened her eyes and said, "Yep - baby is breech." What?!  But I had been feeling that firm little bottom just below my right ribs for weeks!  Turns out the firm boulder-ish lump is really a skull.

Now, at 34 weeks, this was really not a huge concern.  Babies flip all the time.  He could flip right-side down, then flip back up again!  But it's something I want to work on while there is still a good amount of room for movement in the uterus.

My midwives will not deliver a baby that they know to be breech.  Sometimes it happens by surprise, and they go with it.  But I will have to find other care if Todd persists in this position - something I'd really rather not do at this point!

I decided to try acupuncture and chiropractic.  I was able to book an appointment at our community acupuncture clinic (sidenote:  how awesome is it that we have a community acupuncture clinic half a mile from our house that charges $15 per appointment!?) first.  I went in, described my issues (high blood pressure and a breech baby), and Alexa said, "Oh, the 34th week is perfect!  We are going to do some moxa."  It turns out there is a very specialized Chinese Traditional Medicine technique for breech babies.  Here is what she did:  she took two little things that looked like earplugs, and lit one end of them with a lighter until they burned brightly like coals.  The other end was adhesive.  She stuck them on my pinky toes, just below the base of the toenail.  She said to tell her if they became uncomfortably hot.  She also did some "regular" acupuncture with needles in my arms, shins, and feet.  Then she reclined my chair and left me to rest.

I immediately felt the baby become very active.  He kicked and pulled, and I felt his head turning to my right side, almost totally transverse.  He didn't flip all the way (I don't think), but he was certainly trying!

Alexa also sent me home with my very own moxa stick, instructing me to use it every night for ten minutes until I felt the baby turn.  The one she sent with me was different from the little plugs she had used.  My moxa stick is like a thick incense stick - the size of one of those big "first crayons."  It's actually a cigar made of mugwort herb.  I have to light it with our oil lamp because it takes so long to glow.  A lighter would burn me. Then, I sit down and hold it near the base of my pinky toenail, switching sides when it becomes too hot to withstand.  I go back and forth for ten minutes.  Every time, I feel the baby becoming very active again.

After I do my moxibustion each night, I feel very calm and peaceful.  In the same way, going to the acupuncture clinic is just a very calming experience.  It is a large room full of recliners, with people sleeping or reading as they rest and take their treatment - no loud talking, no phone conversations.  Just little murmurs between the acupuncturists and patients, and occasionally a snore.  It is dim, and they have lovely herbal tea you can sip from small ceramic teacups.  Just spending half an hour there, regardless of what they do with the needles, feels really good.  I've decided to go twice a week through the end of pregnancy.

Like I said, no big flip yet . . . but we still have time!  I went to the chiropractor a couple of weeks ago too, but I will save her techniques for another post.

32 weeks

Well, this was originally going to be "30 weeks," then "31," and now it's 32+2.

How do I feel?  Definitely starting to slow down. Definitely retaining some water and needing to put my feet up often.  Definitely getting hard to keep up with the toddler.  And the first part of May still definitely sounds like a long way away.  But I'm still sleeping well, not really having back or stomach pain at this point, and my appetite is good.  So, no complaints.  Just the normal stuff.

Had to switch to the thinner band wedding ring.  This was my mother's ring from my stepfather, which Jeff used when he proposed to me.  I know it's doesn't look like a "traditional" engagement ring.  I don't usually wear it.  My thick white gold band had become a bit uncomfortable.

I have become a little concerned about my blood pressure, although my midwives aren't at all.  I've been consistently in the 130s/80s, which is not a cause for concern.  It's slightly higher than "normal," which would be 120s/70s.  It's worth noting that even when not pregnant, I tend to be in the 130s/80s ("pre-hypertensive."  Joy.)

My worry arises from the fact that a bit of a rise in blood pressure toward the end of pregnancy tends to be par for the course for a lot of women (and was for me with my first pregnancy - I've been carefully tracking my scores and writing them on the record I kept from my pregnancy with Vicki Jo).  With my current measurements, I cannot afford this standard rise.  It will push me up into the 140s/90s, which is cause for concern and could also mean that I need to switch my care to a hospital-based system.

Of course, if this is the situation that presents itself, I will do what I need to do.  I'm not that bent on home birth.  But I'd like to avoid it if possible!

So, I'm trying not to stress.  I'm trying to rest a lot.  And I've starting drinking hawthorn berry tea.  Hawthorn is an herb that has been used for centuries to treat hypertension in all types of people - pregnant and not.  I found the berries at the health food store, and I've been making an infusion - 1 oz dried "haws" or berries (about 1/4 C) in 1 quart of boiling water.  Let it steep overnight, then refrigerate.  I drink 1/2 C in the morning and another 1/2 C in the evening.

I just started this a few weeks ago, and I've read that it can take several weeks to reach an effective dosage, so I will just keep it up and see what happens!  There are no contraindications with hawthorn berry, so I'm not worried about taking it.

I'm leaving for New York in a couple of days, to officiate at the wedding of my very best friend.  I am so excited - on a number of levels.  To celebrate with Amanda and Paul, to see friends both old and new, and to have a hotel room all to myself for two nights.  I plan on watching a lot of television, eating at Whole Foods, and using it as a little personal babymoon.  I'm also hoping no one hassles me about flying "in my condition"!  I've heard that some airlines require a doctor's note, which I definitely don't have.

28 weeks and "how many?"

28 weeks!  Here we are.  If you've been wearying of my chipper attitude, rest assured that things are starting to get a little more . . . uncomfortable.  Mostly I just feel kind of crowded.  No surprise, as I've got a little cabbage in there.  I can't eat as much as normal (and if there's one thing I love, it's eating a lot!).  It's becoming a bit taxing to bend down and tie my shoes or pick up Vicki.  But still, in all - things are really going well.

It's been interesting to note the reactions when we say that we are having a baby boy, in addition to our daughter.  Several people have remarked, "Oh, then there's your family!"  As if having two children, one of each sex, is the perfect combination.  I always want to ask some follow-up questions (like What if it were a girl?  Should we have more then? or Is more or less than two children bad?), but I don't.  I just leave it alone.

People also like to ask if this will be all the children we will be having.  To which I usually respond, "Yes!  For now."  Of course, I have no idea how many children we will be having.  We have one now.  I hope that another will be born safely.  Any more than that is really kind of out of my hands.  We did always know that if we had one child, we wanted another.  Siblings are such an important thing for me, and for Jeff too.  Even if we couldn't have another biological child, we would have tried to adopt another.  But beyond two?  God knows.

I never had much anxiety about whether I would be able to have children or not.  Of course, I never faced infertility, so I can't know what that feels like.  I got pregnant both times very easily.  I have never, that I know of, suffered a miscarriage.  I have a lot of other problems in life, but this doesn't seem to be one of them.  After we had Vicki, I did kind of want to have another child within several years, just to make sure that we could.  I felt a bit of time pressure on that.  But after Todd is born, I feel no clock ticking.  If there are to be more babies, they will come later.  After one or both of the other children are in school.  Because frankly?  Having kids is costly, in terms of money, time, energy, and more.

In light of all this, I heard a great NPR piece on To the Point the other night.  The discussion centered on the United States' fertility rate, which is dropping.  Many of our economic programs depend on the replenishment of the population at the current rate.  Think social security.  Apparently, for sixty or more years, the "ideal" fertility rate (the number of kids most people say they want to have) has been 2.5.  However, we are dropping below that.  We are down into the high 1's now (like 1.8, I think?).  That is not a sustainable rate to maintain our population.  There are many factors in this.  Things like immigration reform (there are many babies born here that are not recognized as being born in our population figures), unpaid and short maternity leave, unsubsidized daycare, the persistent earnings gap between men and women, and so on.  Western European countries, which faced stagnating population decades ago, have somewhat successfully implemented many of these programs as a way to incentivize fertility.

It's kind of a weird thought, because we tend to think of the number of children we have as a very personal matter.  But it's really not!  Children are private as well as social goods.  We invest social resources in them (education, public health), with the anticipation that they will re-invest in society when they come of age and work.  But that may be breaking down.  Of course, the government will never be able to mandate family size (hello fascism!).  But we can make it more attractive to have more children.  One way we do this now is through the dependent tax write-off, which increases proportionally with the number of dependents in your household.

For a long time, I had only thought of family size in terms of environmental effect.  I thought the less children we had, the better, since we have limited resources globally, and the United States already hogs them.  But apparently these economic effects that are in the pipeline will be quite detrimental.

So, maybe we had better have more kids to do our American duty!

consumer conundrum

So, I just found out last night that the lovely ladies at church are going to give us a shower.  What a blessing!

I truly was not anticipating a shower this time around.  I know it's not customary for second or subsequent babies, and we got so much stuff with Vicki that we never ended up using.  We had two showers when I was pregnant the first time, and they were both really special.  We are still working through some of the stuff I got over two years ago!  Things like lotion, bath wash, and diaper cream (which we have never needed because Vicki doesn't really get rashy).

So, I spent several hours on Amazon this morning, trying to think of things we need.  I can honestly say I'm really struggling!  We still have a crib that we never used the first time.  We have a little cradle that Jeff's granddaddy made for him to put in our room.  We never used a baby bath - I just got in the bath with Vicki. We have tons of unisex newborn clothes, and then family and friends to supply boy-clothes hand-me-downs forever.  We never used a changing table or mat.  We still have a monitor and all our bottles and brushes and pacifiers and all that.

The few things I feel like we do actually need are very pricey.  A new carseat (we are just getting a convertible this time around - not messing with the bucket since Jeff ran over it on accident), a new high chair (the Tripp Trapp I want is a little exorbitant), and some diapers and covers.  I will need a breast pump, I know, but the one I like is $1600 and it makes much more sense to rent it from the hospital for the time I need it!  A double stroller would be lovely, but again - costly.

This Bob Duallie would be sweet - only $471!!

So, I ended up with 22 items - 10 of them cloth diapers or diaper covers!  I've decided to stock up with a few more Thirsties size small covers, and then get some Fuzzibunz extra-small pockets to start.  I just scored 13 Fuzzibunz size smalls from a lady in town (30 bucks!), so I think we will be covered, diaper-wise.  I registered for the Tripp Trapp, and the carseat, a Moses basket, a few little toys like a ring stacker, a gorgeous Flensted mobile, and just a few clothes.  And if we don't get any of it - I will still be happy with what we have.

The mobile.  I love it!

I remember feeling very overwhelmed when I registered the first time around.  Was I getting the right things?  How would I know what the baby needed?  A lot of it stemmed from not knowing what our parenting style would be like.  Well, now I know:  it's minimalist, just like the rest of our lifestyle!  Honestly, gift cards would be as helpful, or more helpful than anything.

And then there's the gift my mother-in-law got us the first time around:  eight weeks of housekeeping from a professional service.  I would trade all the other gifts to get that one again!  It was a dream.

I feel like I'm forgetting something vital.  And yet - when I think back to what we needed in Vicki's first year, that was it.  We have a Moby wrap and an Ergo carrier.  She slept in bed with us.  She needed just clothing, diapers, love, and closeness to the two of us.  And those things will be non-negotiables for any of our children!

27 weeks and "the baby"

Things are good here.  I have finally recovered from my long series of cold-flu-sinus infection-etc, and have my fingers crossed that things will remain healthy in the household!  The worst part during the illnesses was thinking about if I were to go into labor with a pre-existing misery like one of those.  Imagine trying to focus on birth, when you feel like absolute crap to begin with!  No thanks.

Blood pressure is good (I snagged an automatic wrist cuff from Jeff's Memaw just to do some checking on myself).  Swelling is minimal.  Body is not very achy.  Appetite is good and actually not all that much larger than normal (which just means that I eat a lot when I'm not pregnant too!).  Weight gain is still unknown.  Baby moves a lot - pretty much on my right side.  He has started to respond to prodding with kicks of his own.  Outlook and attitude pretty peachy.

I've been thinking a lot about Vicki.  We mostly just call her "the baby" or "bub."  As in, "Did you pick up bub from your mom's house?"  Or "I need to give the baby a bath and get her in bed."  Suddenly, this week, it's like, boom.  Soon there will be another baby.  Things are going to get confusing.  I also call her "sis" a lot.  My mom called both my sister and me "sis" or "sissy" very frequently.  It was just sort of a natural nickname.  Maybe she will just have to be sis.

But she is the baby.  She will always be my baby.  She will always be one day old and gorgeous.

She will always wake up in the morning chanting her mantra:  Where Mama go?  Where Mama go?  Where Mama go?  And now I'm crying thinking about her theoretical college graduation and imaginary wedding.  Oh parenthood.  Enough to reduce the most stoic among us to a blubbery mess.  This little girl shreds my heart into ribbons every day - in the best possible way.

And I know that her brother will do it too.

26 weeks and sick again

Here we are, two-thirds through this pregnancy (give or take), and all I can say is:  I'm so sick of being sick! This time it's a sinus infection, which has been plaguing me for about a week.  The worst of it is not being able to sleep for sinus pain and inability to breathe.  Can't heal without sleep!  These repeated illnesses (this is probably the seventh time I've had a bug or cold this pregnancy) have really given me a glimpse into what it might be like to be chronically ill.  I have a lot of sympathy for those who struggle.  Life is hard when you constantly feel like crap!  Hard to work, hard to be a good parent, hard to keep your house neat and cook.

Aside from that major complaint - decreased immunity - I really have very little to gripe about so far.  Which is great!  I was telling my midwife a week or two ago that I think all I remember is the very last part of being pregnant before.  The very miserable part.  So, when I compare this experience to that, it seems amazing!  I feel great!  I can move and walk and get out of bed easily!  I can mop the living daylights out of the kitchen floor without struggling to breathe!  Of course, there is still plenty of time for all that discomfort . . . but for now - things are good.

I'm finally feeling a lot of movement, especially at night.  It's almost visible from the outside - that's always a fun time, when I can show Jeff and Vicki.

There is one big topic I haven't even thought about yet - and have yet to speak about with Jeff!  It just occurred to me a few days ago.  Circumcision.  Oh yeah, we're having a boy.  I'm against it (for children).  Just seems like a decision Todd should be able to make for himself.  Not being observant Jews, we have no religious reason to do it.  And it's not that common of a choice anymore.  Apparently only about half of all baby boys are circumcised in an average hospital after birth these days.  So the whole "locker room" argument is not all that convincing these days.  Better see what Papa says, huh?

Pictures!

Note that I am taking photos in our bedroom!  The addition is done!

24 weeks: then and now

I only have a few belly-growth snapshots from my pregnancy with Vicki.  I took one at 19 weeks, 24 weeks, 30 weeks, and 36 weeks.  Actually, I had my husband take them.  So, here's the side-by-side for 24 weeks with baby #1 and baby #2.

Definitely carrying higher!  Maybe that old tale about baby boys is right?

I'm not totally sure how much weight I've gained.  We don't have a scale at home, so I don't know where I started before I was pregnant.  Sometimes when I feel froggy, I get on the scale at my husband's grandmother's house, but it's about 45 years old.  It shows that I now weigh the same as I did at 24 weeks with Vicki.  I started off lower with her, and gained a lot more than I have thus far with Todd.  My midwives also don't have a scale.  They ask how much I weigh at each appointment, and when I tell them I don't know, they just ask if it feels like I've gained weight!  (Uhhh, yeah.)  Love it.  Unless I experience a sudden, very large gain, accompanied by severe swelling, they don't think that amount of weight gained is really significant for pregnancy.  It's sort of just a "well, the more you gain, the more you have to lose after the baby . . ." type attitude.

23 weeks and diapers

Blah, blah, 23 weeks, blah.  Nothing to say.  Still feel good.  Still puff up with salt.  Still pretty agile on the old feet.  Still not much feeling of movement because I have a placenta pillow in front.

Let's just get to the good part.  The part that any cloth-diapering mother loves.  The newborn stash.

Now, I am not as into this as some mamas.  Some ladies make a real habit of curating the perfect beginning supply for that precious bundle.  I'm a bit more utilitarian.  And that presents the problem.

There are a lot of "ifs" when it comes to cloth diapering a newborn.  Will my baby be huge or tiny?  Will he have slender legs or thick thighs?  Will he wet a lot at once or more moderately throughout the day?  Will he have sensitive skin?  It's enough to almost just make me put it off and make a purchase after the baby is born.  But then I know it will never happen.

There's also the added layer of Vicki and her diapers.  She is in one-size Fuzzibunz pocket diapers with snap closures  (we also have a few Kawaiis that we got as a gift, and they are nice too - especially for overnight with a doubler).  This means they are adjustable, and they still fit her quite well.  I really like these diapers, and once I figured out how to properly wash them, we have had no issues with them at all.  I'd like to reuse them with another baby.  But that means Vicki needs to be done with them first.  (Cue dramatic sigh related to toilet learning.)  It also means that the new baby needs to have a similar body shape (slim thigh, round middle) - and who knows if that will happen!?

The Fuzzibunz did not fit her as a newborn, and I don't think they would fit any but the very largest newborns (like 10 lb or more).  With Vicki almost at 7 lb 1 oz at almost 40 weeks gestation, I don't suspect her brother will be that much larger.  

I got a couple size small Thirsties covers from a friend who didn't want them.  They are pink and orange, but who cares?  Not me, or my son, hopefully!  

So, I have a couple of choices.  I want to use the Thirsties Duo covers that I already have, and I think I only need a couple more because you can get by with not so many of those.  They just need a wipe between changes, and a wash every 10 or 12 changes, unless there's a horrid blowout or something.  

The big decision is what to stuff the covers with.  Prefolds?  We already have a ton of those, and that would be no problem.  But they would be a bit bulky for a tiny one.  I've been eyeing these Green Mountain Diapers (GMD) fitteds.  They are kind of the best of both worlds:  a prefold that they cut and sewed into a fitted.  

They have options with snaps and without.  I will probably go without snaps, since they will be in a cover usually.  I might have to get some Snappis, which I find to be the most obnoxiously named product of all time.  Just in case we want to go cover-less at home, you know.  These fitted diapers are not expensive at all.  The newborn size are $5.50 each.  So let's say I bought twelve, or even twenty of those.  It would only be $110, plus $24.50 for two more covers, and that's it!  $135.50 to diaper my newborn.  Can't beat it.

A note on velcro vs. snaps - I hate velcro.  It never washes right, it gets crud all stuck in it, it irritated Vicki's stomach where it would come unstuck.  So, I go with snaps.  People tend to have strong opinions on this, so form your own!

But before I get too far down the Green Mountain Diapers yellow brick road, I stop to think about the time-honored Kissaluv.  These are by far the most popular newborn fitted diaper.  

They are also more pricey.  $12.95 apiece, with a little bit off if you order in bulk.  

If you know me, you know my legendary cheapness, so you can guess which way I'm leaning.  I might do six Kissaluvs and six GMDs and see which is better after a few days, then make a full order.  A bit more stress with a newborn, but it would be worth it not to be stuck with a bunch of fitted diapers that don't work for us.  

Cloth mamas out there:  what worked for you?  How did you decide on your newborn stash?  What did you spend?

the herb lady

[This post submitted to Sortacrunchy's Your Green Resource 1/3/13.]

I came home with three suspicious-looking sacks the other night.  I would have been very nervous had I been pulled over.  I even had my daughter in the car with me . . . the shame!!

What was in my sacks, you ask?

Herbs!  Alfalfa, nettles, and red raspberry leaf.

I had to gather my supplies to make my very own pregnancy tea!

My midwives gave a packet of literature on nutrition and health during pregnancy at the beginning of our time together.  On one sheet was a recipe for pregnancy tea.  They suggested equal parts nettle and red raspberry leaf, with optional flavorings like rose hips or hibiscus.

Nettle (sometimes called stinging nettle) is an herb that contains many vitamins and minerals, and also acts as a very gentle, natural diuretic, helping move some of that ubiquitous water off the pregnant woman's body.  This was attractive to me, as I got very Michelin marshallow man-esque by the end of my pregnancy with Vicki.  I mean I was retaining a ton of water.  This is not all bad, as a woman's body is meant to retain some, as a kind of "natural IV" for labor.  But too much can be really uncomfortable and can indicate kidney function issues.

Red raspberry leaf is an herb commonly used for female body functions.  It helps with menstrual cramps, cycle regularity, and contains an alkaloid that helps to tone the uterus and prepare it for effective labor.  Since I have absolutely no history of any kind of preterm labor (I never even felt a single contraction - not even any Braxton-Hicks - until my water broke with Vicki!), this is a safe herb for me.  If you are prone to contractions before the time is right, you might stay away, as it can bring them on.

Alfalfa is one I decided to add for my own reasons.  It is also very nutritious, with lots of minerals and vitamins.  A special added benefit is for mothers who are trying to increase their breastmilk production, or prepare the body for lactation.  Vicki and I struggled in the beginning of our nursing relationship, and I wanted to do what I could to help ease those possible problems for the new baby.

I just kind of concocted my own recipe for this tea.  I take 1/4 C (packed down) of each herb and add it to a quart-size mason jar.  Then I fill with boiling water.  This makes a double concentrated batch of tea.  I let it steep overnight, then strain into another jar and top off with water.  All day long, I drink it half-strength over ice, with lemon added for flavor.  I find the flavor pleasantly grassy.  So, in total, this makes 2 quarts of tea.  Which is just about the amount of liquid I need to consume in a day - so all the better!

I did not take any herbs at all during my pregnancy with Vicki, and in fact my first midwife warned me off of red raspberry leaf, saying there was no evidence that it worked.  That may be so, but it's not doing me any harm, and it barely costs anything.  These herbs were each about $1.00/oz at our local health food store, and a huge bag of each hardly came to five or six ounces. 

I suppose only time will tell, but at the very least, it's encouraging me to drink the right amount of non-caffeinated liquids, which can never be bad.  And I have noticed that downing a few glasses after eating a restaurant meal high in processed foods and salt has taken down the swelling I get in my fingers.

And my husband gets to make all kinds of cracks about how I'm going to start supplementing our family's income with my herbs . . . sigh.

22 weeks

So, what to say on this December 29 . . . Christmas happened?  It was fun.

I'm growing increasingly terrified of having a newborn in the house again.  I've realized that, of all the critical moments in pregnancy, labor, and birth - nothing traumatized me quite like those first few months with Vicki.  She is a slightly needier-than-average child, and she was just intense for the first while.  She still is, but now it's fun and exhausting.  Then, it was scary to me.  I remember the night that she was about six weeks old (the eve before my first Mother's Day, no less), and she cried the entire night in my arms.  Screamed.  Nothing could calm her.  I cried and cried and asked Jeff, in total seriousness, why we ever thought this was a good idea.

I guess I'm just not much of a "newborn" person.  And that's okay.  Not every mother has to love every stage of childhood equally.  Who knows - maybe this new baby boy will be completely different.  And of course, as they say, you never step into the same river twice.  I'm a totally different mother now than I was then.  Maybe it will be even worse!  Yay.

In other news:  sodium.  At the end of my pregnancy with Vicki, I got freakishly puffy.  Huge.  Swollen.  Painful to walk on blimp feet.  Rings wouldn't fit.  Had to buy new shoes as not a single pair of my normal ones fit.  Could hardly smile and show my teeth because my face was so water-logged.  Started snoring for the first time ever in my life because my nasal passages were so swollen.  It was awful.

36 weeks with Vicki.  Told ya.

So . . . I'm a little paranoid about that this time around.  And the holidays (and the subsequent traveling we've been doing) had a lot of processed, sodium-laden food.  So far, my nettles seem to be my friend.  I get really thirsty for my herbal tea, and down a few glasses, and it keeps me pretty well in balance.  But I check my ring very frequently.  It's my barometer of whether I've eaten poorly.  If it's tight, I know I need to cut back.  At this point, my feet and ankles seem exempt, but we still have quite awhile to go.  I really have to watch it and stick to my home-made food.  Real sea salt doesn't seem to have the same effect on me as denatured salt.  And my body just does not seem very forgiving on this point.

So . . . photos!

Sorry for the dim and blurry.  I'm at a beautiful stone chapel, about to do the rehearsal for a lovely couple's wedding.

Could've toyed with it in iPhoto and fixed some of it, but . . . I didn't.  

road tripping

We are about to embark on back-to-back roadtrips - one to Arkansas to officiate my sister-in-law's brother's wedding (wrap your mind around that one for a second), and the other to Illinois to see my sister and her family, celebrate my niece's 2nd birthday, and do Christmas with my folks.

I'm more that a little nervous about how our young screecher will do with so much time in the car.  I can't say I blame her - if I was immobilized by a five-point harness for 10 hours at a time, I'd be kind of pissed too.

One of the things this pregnancy has been showing me very starkly is that I need to make my own food.  If I eat a hint of restaurant food, or anything processed, I feel awful.  My digestion is bad, I bloat up, and I retain water.  Like, immediately.  I can't really explain the difference scientifically, but my body somehow knows the difference between the salt I use at home and the salt used in mass-manufactured food.  And it doesn't like the latter.  At all.

The holidays have been a little bit difficult, as we have a lot of family gatherings and special meals where sodium seems to have its own category on the menu.  I also love salty snacks and dishes, so it's not like I'm staying away.  But I decided that for these trips, I was going to pack as much as I possibly could and bring with us.  That way, I could at least minimize the eating out on the road and at the non-family meals.

Here it is!

Clockwise from top, in a spiraling motion: raw milk, homemade yogurt, candied almonds, homemade crackers, homemade granola, home-baked bread, some ham and chicken salad for sandwiches on the road, homemade fruit snacks (this recipe is amazing!), cheese, fruit, carrots & celery, and yogurt dip.

In a way, I'm glad that my body has been giving me such clear signs about what I need to be eating, and what I need to be avoiding.  I truly don't even want to eat out much anymore.  I know that I will feel so much better if I just stick to my plan, and that's what I intend to do!

immune boosters

I have always been a super-hardy individual.  Little viruses, colds, headaches - they tend to pass me by.  I hate taking medicine for superficial stuff, and can usually kick anything with a nap and lots of water. 

Until this pregnancy.

Ho.  Ly.  Crap.  I have a horrible chest cold right now, which makes probably the fifth or sixth time I've gotten seriously, miserably ill in the past 21 weeks.  I know that pregnancy is a natural time of immune suppression, so that your body doesn't recognize the fetus as a parasitic attacker and terminate.  But sakes alive, I did not have this problem in my first pregnancy.  Perhaps having a toddler wiping her snot on your face and sticking her fingers in your mouth all day is not helping anything.  I've had a couple of the worst stomach viruses I've gotten in recent memory, a few colds including this one, and get this:  I used to have tiny seed warts on my hands as a little girl.  About ten years ago, they just went away.  I think my immune system sent the virus into hiding.  Guess what?  Since I've been pregnant this time, they're back!  It's the weirdest thing.  I will get a sore spot on a finger or my palm where a wart is popping up.  I will start to feel the raised spot, and then in a few days it will go away.  My body is really getting a run for its money right now.

So, what's a gal to do? 

One of my strategies is to eat something fermented, and preferably raw, with every meal.  My go-tos are:  yogurt (homemade, or Stonyfield Farms or Cascade Fresh if not).

Sauerkraut (haven't done homemade in ages, but I love Bubbie's).

Kombucha (time to culture a new mother!  I let it go at the beginning of the pregnancy, but I simply cannot justify the exorbitant cost of storebought kombucha).

And I want to get some kefir grains and start culturing some of our raw milk into kefir!

Supplemental things that can help are:

Elderberry syrup.

And probiotics!  Don't forget that gut health and immune health are inextricably intertwined.  If one isn't doing well, the other is bound to have some problems as well.

What are your dietary and home remedies for boosting your immunity?