Thursday, January 17, 2013

perception is reality

In the ministry world, we use this phrase often.  Sometimes reality is not reality.  Sometimes reality is dimensional like a kaleidoscope.  Sometimes what is perceived to be truth is regarded as truth.  Sometimes it's our job to sort it out.  Sometimes it's not.  Sometimes there is still magic and myth.  Sometimes being right is wrong (I'm kind of a righteous person by nature, so I have found this out the very hard way a number of times).



I think blogging is sometimes the same way.  We are lured into blogs (especially personal blogs) because we feel that we are experiencing life alongside the blogger.  But we aren't.  We are experiencing the selected episodes that the blogger lifted out and highlighted.  The very fact that "keeping it real" has become sort of a mode for some bloggers indicates that reality is not really part of the scheme in general.

I found Design Mom the other day.  It's funny because, when Vicki was a wee one and I was up all night, I would watch a lot of House Hunters and House Hunters International.  I saw Gabby and her family on an episode!  They were moving from the US to France, and looking for the right rental house.  I was kind of fascinated by this family with five children that wanted to uproot and move to France  (sidenote:  why so many Mormon female bloggers?  It seems to be a thing).  It's something I could see myself doing someday, if my head didn't explode into a giant flaming nuclear mushroom cloud at some point in the process.

I was browsing her FAQs page and found this incredibly refreshing statement:
One more thing. Please keep in mind that on this blog I attempt to keep things very positive and showcase the best and prettiest things happening in my life. That doesn't mean there aren't bad days and failed projects and lost tempers. At the end of the day, blogs are a show. I suppose that’s why we like them so much.
Yes!  And yes!   I do this too.  My life has lots of low points that I don't necessarily want to rehash with you.  I fight with my husband.  I act like a baby.  I eat crappy food.  I don't mop the floor.  And if this was all totally obvious to you, you are way better at sorting out reality from perception than I am.

I tend to be a little hard on myself, and it can get way out of hand when I look at these shiny visions of what life could be like:  tidy, spare rooms with lovely children perfectly photographed doing perfectly planned activities.  Beautiful food cooked in a designer kitchen and then photographed under perfect light in a corner especially devoted to food photos.  But life ain't always like that.  And I needed the reminder from Design Mom.

2 comments:

Katie Rose said...

Yes, yes, and yes to all of this! I definitely write about the positive and proactive parts of our lives and our meals on my blog. I don't think people want a post about how I ate cereal out of a mixing bowl for dinner (just an example). I do think having the blog, though, makes me strive to be a little bit better - to cook more, entertain more, and do more projects around the apartment, if only just to have some new content for future posts.

Oh, and I have totally wondered too about the Mormon mommy blog thing. So many!

Emily said...

Totally agree! Blogging, or thinking about blogging about certain things we are doing or I'm thinking, encourages me to have a goal in mind. So it forces some organization and occasionally beauty into what I may not otherwise think about. But also agreed - people don't need to be reminded that everyone is human through continual blog reinforcement. :)